I started wondering what’s wrong with me.

I went for a facial treatment and the beautician  pronounced that my skin is in a dire condition and I need to take a much better care of it. She’s not the first to make such pronouncement, but this time I had to heed her advice, as the wedding day is approaching.

I went to have my hair cut and the hairdresser pronounced that my  hair is in a dire condition. I need to take a better care of it.  She’s not the first to say so.  I had to follow her advice and bought the expensive product she suggested. (Not very expensive, actually.  The advantage of my home country’s low currency).

My health screening result is out today.  My cholesterol is high.  I can’t believe it.  I eat canteen food every day: vegetables, tofu, egg, few slices of meat.  Whence came the cholesterol?  (Sitting all day and no exercise, perhaps).  I have not gone swimming for more than 2 years. Sigh.

My professor has mentioned many times how I need to work more seriously and publish more.  Another sigh.  Though to my relief, last week  he said that I am back on the right track now.

Last week I met the wedding-related-people (musicians, cards makers, dressmakers, etc).  I think in general they all seemed to think that I put so little effort and devote so little time to the wedding preparation. My wedding, in case some of you are not clear.

And so many other things are left unlearned and undone. Lectio divina, St. Ignatius’s spirituality, not to mention the daily Scripture reading.  So many books are left unread.  The Man who was Thursday, the Unfinished Tales, Claus von Stauffenberg, what have become of all those?

What’s wrong with me? I do not even slack or enjoying myself.  Every morning I always said to myself, “What would I not give to stay at home, read a book and work in silence.”